Most men make the mistake of contracting the pelvic floor and muscles around the penis when close to the edge – and often completely unconsciously. When you are about to come the pelvic muscles seem to tense up all by themselves … So what do you do?
The answer is …
You do the OPPOSITE.
You consciously RELAX your pelvic muscles.
If you are actively relaxing in your pelvic muscles, you will send a SIGNAL to your body that you are not about to ejaculate.
The body reacts to these small commands given by your physiology, and it now prepares itself to cool down again.
So if you are on the edge, then RELAX in your pelvic muscles rather that doing what most men do: contracting.
In other words, tensing and contracting intensify the arousal and pleasure – while relaxing cools you down.
This – and many other essential small sneaky trickes is what you will receive in the TantraCURE system.
Its important to understand how the body reacts to different SIGNALS and to small changes in physiology. In this way you can go in and consciously change how the body reacts by modifying a few things in your body – in this way you avoid following your biology that will instinctively take you over the edge in a few minutes – or seconds.
The most normal mistake men do in pelvic muscle training …
Most pelvic muscle training teaches med to CONTRACT in the buttocks and pelvic floor to get a better muscle tonus. And yes, strong muscles are an important part of having a strong and healthy pelvic region.
But it is not enough just to CONTRACT, you also need to know how to RELAX in the area.
“If all you are training is the contraction of your pelvic muscles, you will find that your premature ejaculation gets worse”
If all you are training is THE CONTRACTION of your pelvic muscles, you will find that your premature ejaculation gets WORSE.
When you don’t relax in your muscles after having contracting them, the muscles become tired. This means they start “vibrating” during sex due to tiredness. This gives weaker erections where the semen has a tendency to simply leak out. Resulting in a loss of ability to last long in bed.
10 years ago when I started to train my pelvic muscles, I started out HARD and FANATICALLY. In the beginning it seemed that my erection got harder and that I had more control over my sexual energy. But I quickly realized that my efforts BACKFIRED.
My pelvic floor started to shake and “vibrate” during sex, and I got a feeling of TIREDNESS in the whole area – with the result that my erections became weak and that I had less control of my level of arousal.
In pelvic muscle training the ESSENTIAL KEY is LEARNING TO RELAX THE MUSCLES.
Why normal pelvic muscle training is not enough …
I have noticed that most people that guide others in pelvic muscle training unfortunately only speak about the “pelvic muscles” or the “PC muscle”.
But the “PC muscle” in fact refers to a whole set of muscles that can be subdivided into different areas that need to be trained individually.
Its not enough to contract your buttocks in a chaotic and random way while waiting for the bus!
There are 3 main areas you need to train in different combinations.
One area for harder erections, one area for better control, and one area that is in charge of leading surplus sexual energy away from the pelvic region..
All of these areas need to be strong and need to be able to be relaxed ON COMMAND – and you need to be able to relax and contract these areas SPECIFICALLY.
“Pelvic muscle training is complex, and it easily creates confusion if it is not done in a systematic way”
So pelvic muscle training is complex, and it easily creates confusion if it is not done in a systematic way.
In the TantraCURE training you a get a top class pelvic muscle program that systematically guides you through all the necessary areas, step by step so that you gradually increase your strength, become more aware of the different areas – and learn how to RELAX them in the proper way.
The pelvic muscle training in TantraCURE has been created for men that wish to last as long as they want and to strengthen their sexual stamina.
The program will also help you to use the pelvic floor to open up the flow of sexual energy in your body, so that you avoid always being on the verge of ejaculating – and instead can EXPAND YOUR PLEASURE and get MORE INTENSE ORGASMS.
Not bad, hey?
And thats just a few of the BENEFITS of training your pelvic floor.
And thats not all. Pelvic muscle training is just one of the essential things that you will be training in the 12 week program that teaches you to be at top class lover.
To last longer in bed can be learned through the right training – so join the wave and do as 3000 men have done before you. Join the TantraCURE system TODAY:
Did you know that we have two nervous systems that both play a HUGE role during sex?
Knowing about your parasympathetic (“relaxed”) nervous system – or the sympathetic (“stressed”) nervoussystem will greatly help you on your quest to last longer.
The parasympathetic nervous system is activated when we are relaxed. The body is digesting your food and you are breathing slowly and deeply. Life is a breeze and nothing is threatening our well being or comfort.
On the other hand – in a life threatening situation your brain activates the sympathetic nervous system which helps prepare your body for fight or flight mode. The breathing speeds up and blood is sent to your muscles instead of your digestive system – which effectively is put on hold. Your whole body tenses up as you prepare to either fight for your life or to escape.
Being in the parasympathetic nervous system makes you last longer because of a long row of complex biochemical processes in the body.
Part of the job of the sympathetic nervous system on the other hand, is to help the body rid itself of bodily liquids (including semen) – as quickly as possible (thats why you either urinate or deficate in situations of high anxiety) – so you want to avoid getting into a sympathetic mode unless you want to ejaculate off course.
Most men that suffer from premature ejaculation start making love when the sympathetic (stressed) nervous system is already fully activated
Most men that suffer from premature ejaculation start making love when the sympathetic (stressed) nervous system is already fully activated.
So its quite important that you start the lovemaking in a relaxed state of being.
If you begin the love making in a relaxed or parasympathetic mode you get what is called a “relaxed erection”.
The type of erection you get in a stressed mode is called a “stressed erection”.
The advantages of a relaxed erection are:
You get a more balanced brain chemistry during sex that makes it easier for you to last long
Your dopamine levels in the brain will rise slowly instead of “peaking” in the matter of a few minutes
You avoid getting oversensitive so you wind up coming too quickly
If on the other hand you start the love making hard core style with no foreplay you will get a “stressed erection” where your sympathetic nervous system controls the show – and in this case the show will be over pretty quickly!
There are many things you can do to start of the lovemaking with a “relaxed erection”:
Do foreplay (at least 10 minutes) where you focus on entering a relaxed enjoying mood, instead of allowing yourself to become overly aroused and excited
You can also enter the relaxed parasympathetic mode by giving and receiving massage before the lovemaking, so if you can get your girlfriend into the massage thing, it will greatly help you
Or you can join the TantraCURE system to get a TON of advice on how you can get “relaxed erections”:
You’re making love with your woman and its going pretty good.
…But all of a sudden you come too quickly without even knowing why it happened!
10 years ago when I myself suffered BIG TIME from premature ejaculation I had absolutely NO IDEA of why I came too quickly – it just kind of happened.
I would be thinking “this is going gooood” and all of a sudden I would ejaculate …
So I felt completely clueless to what I could do to solve the problem.
And that left me feeling deeply frustrated.
Sounds like something you know?
But through a long period where I tried all sorts of techniques to lasting longer in bed, I found out how you can know with ABSOLUTE CERTAINTY how close you are to the edge.
I developed a kind of “technique” that helped me avoid ever coming too early, and I will pass it on to you now.
Here is what you do …
First of all you need to become aware of your current level of arousal.
You need to give your level of arousal a number on a scale of 1 to 10.
10 being so excited that you will come in the next thrust.
5 being a medium level of arousal – a level where you are ready to start the lovemaking.
And a number 1 being the first initial sexual thought crossing your mind …
If you suffer from premature ejaculation you are almost certainly already at level 9 before even STARTING to make love. And from a 9 to a 10 there is not much room for fun and games … starting at level 9 does not enable you to last much longer than a minute (or perhaps two on a good day).
So that obviously sucks.
“If you are too aroused then WAIT before you penetrate”
Therefore you must decide to never start making love when you are higher than a level 5.
So if you are too aroused then WAIT before you penetrate.
Moreover you need to decide that you never move beyond level 7 during lovemaking! This gives you enough headroom to be able to shortly go up to level 8 and still have enough time to cool down to a level 7 again.
When you learn to put a number on your level of arousal you can make a conscious decision of reducing your level and applying the brakes so you always are on the good side of the point of no return.
The first 10 minutes are the most difficult …
Remember that the first 10 minutes are the most difficult. If you succeed to last more than 10 minutes and then remember to keep yourself at level 7 then you most probably can make it to half an hour or more.
Putting a number on your level of arousal is just one of the techniques you can apply to control your level of arousal.
“If you succeed to last more than 10 minutes and then remember to keep yourself at level 7 then you most probably can make it to half an hour or more”
By learning all the arousal techniques, you will not only become more aware of your level of arousal, you will also learn to contain more and more sexual energy in your body during lovemaking – this allows you to gradually stay longer and longer at each level so you finally can stay at level 9 where the enjoyment is at an absolute peak WITHOUT BEING AFRAID OF COMING. This is where the magic is. When you are perfectly balanced between a 9 and 10 you start experiencing MULTIPLE ORGASMS without ejaculating. Cool huh?
There is one place where you learn all of this RIGHT HERE and NOW.
By joining the TantraCURE training you will learn all that you need to last long in bed, and you will soon understand and master some of the greatest secrets to attracting, opening and deeply satisfying a woman.
You can download the TantraCURE system straight away and begin your training in becoming a super lover that really can satisfy women.
The only thing you need to do is to click here and download a system that includes hours of training videos and manuals.
If you are not ready to become a super lover in 12 weeks – you can start by downloading an amazing technique by clicking on the button in the sidebar to your right. This technique will help you STRAIGHT AWAY to start controlling your sexual energy and arousal level – and the best thing is that its COMPLETELY FREE.
Psychological factors are the most important underlying factors of premature ejaculation. Premature ejaculation more often than not stems from a wide range of detrimental emotions, which undermine our ability to perform well.
MY EXPERIENCE SHOWS ME THAT 90% OF MEN THAT SUFFER FROM PREMATURE EJACULATION HAVE A LOT OF NEGATIVE SELF TALK GOING ON IN THEIR HEADS REGARDING THEIR SEXUALITY, THEIR SELF CONFIDENCE, AND REGARDING WOMEN.
My first step towards curing premature ejaculation came from clearing out my own emotions about sexuality! Until then I had accumulated a lot of knowledge about sexuality but it was not helping me because I had emotional blockages, both in my relationship with myself and how I saw women. The moment I cleared these emotions everything started falling into place allowing me to use the other techniques I had learned optimally.
Based on my own experience and from my experience in guiding other men I have found that the most common emotional blockages surrounding sexuality are as follows:
Premature Ejaculation and Ignorance
Ignorance can be seen as a kind of emotion because you can “willfully” keep yourself in a state of ignorance due to whole blend of deeper underlying reasons including laziness or being comfortable in status quo.
Most men have no idea what sexuality is and how it ties into your body and mind. Sexuality is seen as a kind of way of letting go of steam.
In my own case many years passed where I had a problem with premature ejaculation but didn’t even see it as a problem. There was a kind of “that’s how I am, this is normal” kind of thought pattern. I did not know anything about sexuality, how it affected my moods and inner states and I did not care much either. Ejaculation for me was a way of letting of steam every second or third day and if I did not perform well in bed, well that was just too bad. I saw no correlation between the fact that I was not performing well in bed with my deteriorating relationship to the girlfriend I had at the time and my own moodiness and lack of clarity in life in general.
Premature Ejaculation and Non-Communication
Many men are very bad at communicating about their problem. This was definitely the case for me. The ignorance about the problem coupled with the fact that sexuality is a sensitive thing made me repress the issues, in the sense that whenever my girlfriend brought it up I would give her a blank stare and evade the subject directing the conversation into other topics. If she got too insistent I would just snap back that this was how I was and that there was nothing I could do about it.
Lack of communication signals to a woman that you don’t appreciate her and you don’t love her. A woman is more concerned with you communicating with her than the fact that you have a problem, but at the time I was not able to communicate about it. I did not have a sufficient level of maturity or courage or knowledge to deal with the problem and to face it head on.
I can tell you the following: If you suffer from premature ejaculation and you feel bad about it discuss it with your girlfriend if you have one. Tell her that you are working on it and that you need her support with this. She’ll be so happy that:
1) You want to satisfy her and want to make her happy.
2) You show masculinity by dealing with a problem. Wussy men complain about their problems without doing anything. Masculine men realize that there is a problem and then they do anything they can to fix it.
Premature Ejaculation and Guilt
Guilt is a huge factor among many men and is related to non-communication. Many men simply are not comfortable with sexuality and refuse to speak about the issues. You should come to terms with whether you feel guilty about your sexuality. In this case it could be valuable to go back in your past and find out what the feelings were about sexuality in your childhood home.
I tell you this: Work with the guilt and get it into the light. A fulfilling sexual life is your birth right as a man. To be able to fully satisfy a woman is a great thing, in fact it´s your duty as a man. Sexual energy is your life energy. By embracing your sexuality you embrace life. You will be a happier you, you will have a happier and more compliant woman, you will do the things you do better and with more passion – and simply spread more joy into the world. By solving your PE and getting a fulfilling sexual life you not only become happier yourself, you simply serve the world better.
Isolation and pornography
Many men who suffer from premature ejaculation and who cannot communicate about the problem end up surfing Internet pornography as a way of dealing with their frustration.
There exists a natural explanation: The need for a substance called dopamine, especially in the brains of men. Men need something, which excites them and creates variance in their lives. If they can’t get their sexuality to work out properly pornography, fatty salty foods (junk food) and video games become some of the pass times that men can indulge in, but as with anything else a pass time can quickly become an addiction if you don’t balance your dopamine levels with more healthy less reclusive behavior patterns.
Again it´s important you wrap your head around this concept.
ITS NOT YOUR FAULT! Your wiring is against you. Your brain craves dopamine. Instead of hitting yourself over the head with negative selftalk about you being a bad person because you have this and this bad habit, study how addicition works and in this study you’ll be helping yourself out of it. Knowledge is power. Knowledge brings awareness and raises your level of consciousness.
Premature Ejaculation and Seeing That You Have The Problem
After my girlfriend broke up with me I spent a lot of time with one night stands going to bed with different women. Now that I was suddenly meeting new women and taking them home with me, my problem suddenly became very apparent!
When you are with a stable girlfriend it can become easy to ignore the problem because the subconscious mind has a tendency to become lazy. “She knows that I have a problem, that’s the way it is, I can’t do anything about it, she’s gotta accept it”
Premature Ejaculation, Nervosity and anxiety
My bad performance in bed was making me nervous and jittery. I would be completely out of touch with myself when I finally would start making love with a woman. First of all this nervosity led to weak erections and a feeling of being out of touch with my penis. This is a terrible state to be in as the slightest touch on a ”jittery weak erection penis” can cause premature ejaculation. Once you get into this state it can be quite tough to get out of it. It is almost a kind of vicious circle. The only way I could get a strong erection was if I could somehow get my flaccid penis up in the vagina and start thrusting and feeling my partner respond to it with pleasure. This would give me the necessary self-confidence to get the erection hard again and thereby get over the “jittery weak erection” state.
It’s a funny thing that being afraid to ejaculate too early is one of the things that will make you ejaculate really fast!
Premature Ejaculation, Self-confidence and masculinity
If I was lucky enough and got through the “jittery weak erection” phase without ejaculating things got easier for perhaps 5 to 10 minutes but then a little lack of awareness (often caused by “sexual greed”) would send me over the top.
In this period I was having a lot of masculinity issues. A lot of men before they center into a stable state of masculinity are caught up in an unhealthy mindset. They feel weak, lack self-confidence and have very low self-esteem. To counter for this they often act aggressively in situations where they don’t need to and try to play tough and macho. The problem is that if you have not found your center of masculinity you will forever be trapped in a kind of neurotic game where you either are weak and whimpering or aggressive and macho.
In my case masculinity issues made me oversensitive to how other men perceived me and treated me. I was very easily provoked, by any man, or woman, who implied that I was weak.
This pattern also manifested itself in bed. I would be an all gung ho masculine male attracting women around me and taking them to bed. And once in bed I would become nervous and jittery and my erections would be weak. Whenever I had ejaculated too fast, I would try all kinds of things so the woman could not see I had ejaculated. I would also try all kinds of evasive maneuvers so the woman could not see how anxious I was.
Too many of these kind of experiences lower your self confidence with regards to sexuality and keep you in the perpetual pendulum state I mentioned above, where you swing between states of overaggressive defensive macho masculinity to states where you feel weak and helpless. If you recognize these patterns within yourself reading step 6 about masculinity will do wonders for you.
Premature Ejaculation, Stress and Tension
A growing problem I often faced was a continual stress and tension. Certain typologies of men have a lot of testosterone and sexual drive, and I am one of them. If the energy is not channeled you can often feel very restless. It is like to trying to put a lid on a pressure cooker. This stress and tension often builds up if you have stressful fulltime jobs or other projects that engulf you. In periods where I was very stressed I had very bad ejaculatory control. The moment I started making love I would literally blow up.
I was very intent though on being able to live life without stress so I tried out all sorts of methods and techniques to calm my mind and body. Stress leads to shallow fast breathing and a faster heart rate. It can also lead to tensions in certain parts of the body including the feet, legs and back. In this period I found out that if I received a lot of massage, performed full body relaxation techniques and did breathing exercises that the problems with stress would disappear and alongside that the problems of premature ejaculation.
Premature Ejaculation and Lack of love
Another major cause of premature ejaculation is a feeling of lacking love. In periods where I was depressed, I was simply not present in the lovemaking. It was as if I was disengaged with the woman I was making love with and premature ejaculation would often be the side effect of that lack of love.
The ability to feel love is very much tied in with masculinity. As we start to find our true masculine core, our heart starts to radiate and we begin to love others instead of expecting to be loved. This shift of consciousness is very important in the quest to lasting longer.
Premature Ejaculation and Lack of feeling of growth – boredom
Premature Ejaculation issues also often come to men who feel stuck in their lives. If there is no growth, no enthusiasm, no feeling of achieving your life goals, the sexual energy does not rise and it will start to stagnate. There will be a tendency for carelessness in ones approach to sexuality.
After I met the girlfriend who I am with today and who introduced me to Tantra I made a 3-week long meditation retreat where I solved many of these emotional issues.
This meditation retreat had a miraculous influence on me that made everything fall into place.
Today my lovemaking is completely different. The foreplay is long, the touching soft and caressing, I have my awareness on the woman instead of myself and the lovemaking can last for hours. Lovemaking is absolutely blissful and for me in my life now is a tool for spiritual development.
Performing this meditation retreat solved a lot of my inner turmoil.
These kinds of retreats are essential in your personal growth. It lies in the essence of men to sometimes pull back from the world to reassess their lives and to regain contact with their essence. In TantraCURE I also address many issues of masculinity and how you can get more in touch with your masculine essence.
Today I conduct courses and seminars for men teaching them how they can unblock the things inside that are preventing them from lasting long in bed, while giving them the tools to fulfill themselves and their girlfriends.
As you can see, my issues with premature ejaculation very much tie in with the process of my own self-development. From ignorance to non communication, to anxiety and masculinity issues, to lack of body awareness and to lack of knowledge about how I was using sexuality in general. From my experience with guiding other men I see that these processes I have described are not unique to me and I am sure many of you can recognize many of these patterns within yourself.
You Can Cure Your Premature Ejaculation Starting Tonight
In TantraCURE I will go more in depth about how you can cure these issues with simple techniques.
Many of you have the wrong idea that you have to go through endless therapy sessions to get to the bottom of emotional blockages. I do not subscribe to this point of view. From my experience from Taoism and Yoga and through my work with men, I know that emotional blockages are caused by energetic blockages which can be eradicated by quick effective self therapy. In TantraCURE I will give you these techniques and explain them step by step so you can start curing any emotional blockage easily, quickly and efficiently.
With TantraCURE follows a membership forum where you can ask me questions about the techniques or if you need feedback, support or advice.
If you have any questions about TantraCURE, please leave a comment down below and I’ll get back as quickly as possible.
I wish you a great day and lots of success on your path to sexual mastery
P.S. If this article was interesting for you then
Desensitizing creams and sprays, extra thick condoms, shooting your load out in the bathroom before going to bed with a woman…
There seems to be no limit to what men will do in sheer desperation just to last a minute or two longer.
But – do you prefer to have a bag full of gimicky solutions, or would you prefer to learn to last longer in bed in a natural way – once and for all?
If you had any sense in your head you would probably choose the last option.
The problem is that there still is a lot of ignorance out there when it comes to premature ejaculation, and many men still don’t know that learning to last long in bed is something that can be learned. This ignorance comes from premature ejaculation being a taboo subject.
“In our culture sex is something we are expected to be good at without practising”
Sex can be talked about openly in most countries in our modern society, but sexual problems and our difficulties facing these problems are more difficult and sensitive. In our culture sex is something we are supposed to be able to engage in without practising, AND we have this underlying idea that sex is something that we continue engaging in all our life without making any attempt at improving ourselves, learning new things or gaining new abilities.
Maybe that would be nice, but it doesn’t work like that in reality.
Have you ever heard of anybody that plays great tennis without practising?
Or plays amazing guiter, golf, or speaks fluent Swahili?
Even learning to drive a car needs practice and training.
Funnily enough we have no problems understanding that these things need a certain amount of discipline in order to learn them.
And learning to last long in bed is no exception to this rule. To last long you need the right kind of training.
“I tried all kinds of quick fix solutions …
But at the end of day I found out that the only way forward was through disciplined training”
So not only is premature ejaculation a big taboo. Men have a tendency of seeing premature ejaculation as something that cannot be fixed instead of seeing it for what it really is – something that EASILY can be cured with the right mindset and training.
In this way many men keep themselves from learning to become good lovers due to ignorance. We push the problem away from us or refuse to admit that we even have the problem. OR we try to “solve” it by using desensitizing creams, thick condoms or by “relieving the pressure” out in the bathroom before engaging in sex.
The Premature Ejaculation Ostrich
By being an ostrich you refuse to see the problem straight on. You choose to close your eyes and bury your head in the sand like an ostrich – instead of getting to the core of the issue and fixing it.
The Premature Ejaculation Ostrich
But these are not solutions. To anesthesize the skin on the penis with creams and sprays is one of the most lame techniques out there.
Oversensitivity is seldom just a problem of over sensitive skin on the penis, but a question of a combination of the brains response mechanism, the body, the spinal chord and the pelvic muscles. So by putting a bit of this “mosquito repellent” cream on your penis – the only thing you will achieve is a doped penis where you feel even less of what is going on and how close or far you really are from the edge. Instead of doping your penis, its better to become more aware of your sensitivity so you learn what actually is happening down there.
What do you prefer: To have desensitizing cream on your whole body before you go out on a bicycle ride – or to learn to keep your balance on your bike so you don’t fall?
The worst piece of advice in my opinion, advice even given by many sexologists, is to go out and masturbate and ejaculate in the bathroom before engaging in sex with your woman.
Not only do you risk not being able to get it up again, you also risk feeling emotionally and physically drained so that the sexual experience becomes diluted.
Knowing just a little bit about what sexual energy is, and why its important to take care of it, you would understand that the “masturbate before meeting your woman” advice will just cause more problems for you, such as erectile dysfunction, lack of potence and actually WORSEN your premature ejaculation problem.
Cure Premature Ejaculation With The Right Training
If you want to learn to last longer in bed then there is only one way forward and that is to start the right kind of training. A daily training that will take you from where you are – and step by step teach to become a super lover that can last as long as you want.
And this can be learned relatively quickly with the right kind of training.
Get Your Hands On This Amazing Technique!
By clicking on this link you can get your hands on an amazing ancient technique using natural methods that will help you to overcome performance anxiety and last longer in bed. A technique amazingly simple to perform but devastatingly powerful.